hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Randomize