I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
Randomize