Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
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