she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
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