Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
