It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
