I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
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