This girl is more easily done than said...
New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
Randomize
