I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
After tacos, we're chasing women.
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
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