Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
