Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
