then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
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