You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
I am mentally ready for anal.
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
Randomize
