Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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