Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
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