69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
In the 30 seconds it took me to leave the bar I let the barback motorboat me, ripped open a stranger's shirt and bit his chest, then made out with El Camino dude. No, I'm not coming out tonight.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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