Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Randomize
