There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
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