somebody snuck up and got me drunk
If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
i just google imaged poop.
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
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