She's JV to your varsity
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
Randomize
