i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
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