69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
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