Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Randomize
