i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Randomize