Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize
