she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
Randomize