Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize
