I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
Randomize