This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
Randomize