This girl is more easily done than said...
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
