drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Randomize
