that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
