this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
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