I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
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