it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
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