First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Randomize
