Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
Randomize
