fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
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