problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize