Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
