i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
I think we might need a safe word for this...
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