is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
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