I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
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