Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
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