oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
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