I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
Randomize
