Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
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