You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
