Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
He passed out mid-signature
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
I'm having to shit out rocks
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