Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
Randomize
