So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
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