After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize
